My eyeballs fixate on the wall across from me
Tick, tock, tick, tock
As the Little hand
chases behind the big one
Minute hand,
hour hand
Isn’t it time yet?
I think to myself.
On the wall once white now stained with hints of brown
The foam from the seat I’m seated in
Spills out of the cushion
Exposed like my naked body was the nights before
My Heartbeat fast like the Congo drum
My hands clammy, slips and slides
Softens the calluses that line my palms
They slide like butter now against each other
Sweat droplets gather in my dark moist crevice
My vaginal cave filled with his stalagmite
Back in the room
Our Feet and thighs shake
We all sit here lined up,
brave souls await their fates
“Next!”
The nurse’s voice blares like police sirens
Painful, startling like nails dragging across a chalkboard
The pungent smell of alcohol swabs and hand sanitizer burns
through the hairs in our nostrils
with each swing open of the door
My stomach churns and bubbles
Finally,
she walks over to me
I wonder who will be next
Curiosity
like duck, duck goose
Duck she walks past
Duck she walks past another
Goose! I am chosen
She hands me a white paper
It’s folded over
My fate on the other side
My mind revisits the question
“What will you do if it comes back positive?”
Suddenly my mind ponders to all the “one night stands”
Passion turned horror film
When I allowed strangers deep inside my most vulnerable
places
Exchange of saliva as our lips part
Our tongues dance
As we Desperately race to “come”
Exchange of bodily fluids as he
prods and pokes at my
interior
he unloads in me, fills my emptiness
Pubic hairs tough like brillo pads rubbing against grease lined
dishes
My cavity his sink
I bathe in him
I envision the seminal fluid swimming in my womb
Vibrant and full of life
Their goal conception
Their destination the egg
Navigating through my cervix
Circling my ovaries
Our act like Russian roulette
But was the gun loaded or empty that night?
Only this paper will tell
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